Some Times….

Lately, I have had some “time”.  It has been a real gift to slow down to get things done. I have gone from three jobs to two and have flexibility to some extent in both of those.  This “time” that I feel is just returning has allowed me to look around a little more.  Here is what I see:1.) My house is a mess.  I am not sure how because I feel like I am perpetually cleaning. Of course the odds are against me, as it is five against one around here. But, I have taken this time to not only do inventory on the outside but also on the inside and I have to admit what someone said to me the other day, I am a “slob”.  I hate that word, it is beneath me and yet it is me.  But, as I told this person who really was talking about my office where I am in the process of cleaning out 15 years of crap (JUST CRAP that was not my doing!) I am also the only one who seems to clean.  I am not sure if it is the duality of my nature that I mess and clean at the same pace but I envy those who can pick a lane…a clean lane. I have also decided that the time my house stays clean for a week will be the time to worry because that will mean all of the activity of my life will have dwindled dramatically and I will have nothing else to do but clean.  God forbid.2.)  I love thinking and writing.  I have had so many things in my head lately since I didn’t have the mental wherewithal to muster anything up when I was swirling in work and life madness the last two years. But now I do, and the quiet of my house with the kids at school and my husband at work, the only other sounds being the heater and fireplace and my bunny makes for a very peaceful place.  Winter is the only season that allows this.3.) I really missed my people.  Because time was so limited I focused on my husband and kids and immediate family.   I was interacting with people constantly but not always “my people”  so when I got to get back to that, I felt whole again.  So grateful for their patience.4.) My prayer increased and my joy increased. My prayer increased and my surprise blessings increased.  My prayer increased and my ability to detach increased.  My prayer increased and my sense of peace increased. My prayer increased and the understanding of others around me increased. You get the picture.  “I can do all things through God who sustains me.”5.) Returning to my 3.5-5.0 mi walks most days has been a real gift.  Doing it with my husband has been even better.  I missed that time.  I have a plaque, “Nature is my medicine” and it is true.6.) I still need to control my distractability ….it is pretty bad.  So my new prayer is for focus. 7.) Gratitude is the only way for me.  Sometimes it is a real struggle but mostly I can see God where I need to. I am grateful for any experience that leads me into a deeper appreciation of my life.