“Searching for God at Ground Zero” Fr. James Martin SJ

I feel like I am in “All Martin, all the time” mode but I stick with one writer and then I move on so bear with me in today’s thought.While I was filling in yesterday at the Diocesean Faith Formation Office, I was wandering around and happened to find James Martin, SJ’s book on 9/11 called “Searching for God at Ground Zero”.  As I wrote on his FB page, reading it was a humbling and spiritual experience.  It takes us through the first month after the attacks right to the site where the courageous men and women, from all walks of life,  went to rescue and then clean up the disaster area.  It brought me back brutally ten years and it was interesting to see that the emotion as I read it was still strong.  When the attacks occurred my then toddlers were playing on the floor in the living room and my husband called and told me to turn on the TV to the news; I did just in time to see the second airplane hit the second tower.  Like everyone else it took me a minute to process what I was seeing.  A plane hitting a tower.  I remember it never occurring to me that there were people in there until that was actually addressed.  The idea that there could be so many people was obviously now something that my mind could wrap around.  But I do remember looking at my then three year old and saying we have to pray really hard.  She said “it’s ok Mommy, those are just buildings, those aren’t people” and of course I assured she was right.  They were just buildings.  But that was when my prayer started.  I don’t remember it ending for quite a while…and it was always the same thing, “God help them, God be with them, God protect us.”  Prayers of protection and sustainability.  Then the Pentagon, and then Pennsylvannia where I later learned that someone I knew lost a brother.  I never knew if the prayers were of any use until I read this book.  I mean, of course I knew they were of use, I know that God hears and answers my prayers but I don’t always know how…none of us do.  But while I was reading this book I had the image of my living room, and my memory brought back the state of my heart and how I was praying hard to lift those people up in my tiny little way.  It was the only thing I felt I could do at that moment.Ten years have passed, and they have been ten hard years.  It is odd to consider what the world was before 9/11.  As Stephen Colbert pointed out the other night on his show, our biggest fear in the summer of ’01 was shark attacks.  Laughable now.  Oddly enough, I don’t live in fear though.  I live in hope.  When I read this book, I know why I live in hope.  I encourage everyone to take a moment and read it.  It is also  a good reminder that we need to keep holding the people who survived, who rescued, who ministered and who witnessed in prayer.