Discerning Through Chaos

These past couple of months have had me in a whirlwind, working non-stop and having to be on top of kid’s activities left and right.  I am so glad we are in exam time for the older two and that school is almost over for the younger.  But the work keeps pouring in.  (For this I am grateful)I feel like I need my brain split in two as I discern a ministry offer for the upcoming year while I am trying to do all of these other things.  I find it so contrary to try to discern in the midst of chaos…and yet I am trying.  Writing this, alone, is a challenge because I know we need groceries and I know I have to coupon this week and that takes time and this is my only day off which it really isn’t because I have to meet with a committee I am on and I have an appt in the middle of the day.  That is the flow of my thoughts….I have to get my garden in, I forgot to go and get the rhubarb which means no rhubarb berry jam that everyone in my immediate and extended family likes.  I have to get teacher gifts, oh the wedding is next week, I need to paint  my hall…no I need to do laundry, no first I need to put laundry away…my kids have not had much home baked stuff lately….OY!It makes me laugh…because it is too true, oh shoot, I forgot to order checks again which means I can’t pay for band lessons over the summer that when I try to focus my mind wanders.  And then to get myself back on track, I try to remember that I am suppose to be prayerfully considering something, but I have to change the bunny’s cage!  I have to follow up on that recall letter…so I ask my friends who are also going a little bonkers about now, though they may not have a bunny, and I ask God to speak to me through their wisdom. I ask God to hear my concerns, and even fears and to hear my hopes and vision and to speak to me through my friends.  They have never let me down.  Somehow, God has surrounded me with people who know (truly know) and accept me for all that I am, and they sometimes see things better for me.  They, in their love, give me clarity.  They, in their generosity, give me insight and understanding.  They do for me, oftentimes, what I have already done I simply don’t know it until I hear a word from them, these people that I trust with so much.  So though I feel like I am the headliner of a mental circus, I find that through the faith that these people have in me, I am up to the task. Generally, my answer is the first one I started with anyway, I am just trying to be obedient to the process.  Thank God for good friends…