Here is an interview I had last night with Pope Francis….in my imagination of course. But I feel like we won the Papal lottery and as we say in New York, hey, you never know!Me: Good Morning Dearest Pope Francis for dearest you shall ever be….Pope Francis: Have you been reading Jane Austin, Annette?Me: I confess, sir, I have.PF: No need to confess, there is no sin in Jane Austin.Me: God bless you for that sir. Now may we begin the interview.PF: Certainly.Me: So, you are being hailed as the much desired reformer in our church, an answer at least for the moment to my prayers…PF: Haha only for the moment? Me: Yes, well, forgive me for that….speaks to my own limitations not to your character.PF: Oh dear…carry on.Me: So as a reformer I was hoping that you could answer a couple of questions for the general public because there are so many people watching right now. PF: Yes, thanks be to God.Me: Indeed.
Question one: You are quoted as rejecting the red velvet cloak with ermine trim and the red shoes saying: “The carnival is over.” Is that correct.PF: (Chuckles) Yes, I did.
Me: Then is it safe to ask when these poor men will be relieved of these horrible uniforms? Honestly, they look like court jesters. It is a little more than embarrassing.PF: I couldn’t agree more. I will look into it. But you know, it is delicate because it is such an honor to be part of the guard, to tell some of these men how ridiculous they look is a little more than insensitive…that and I am from Buenes Aires.Me: I know, but really, sir, you are the one talking about mercy, please have mercy on us.PF: I hear you, Annette.Me: Moving on. So, this picture of you on the subway, or train, what are you reaching for? You don’t look amused and the man next to you looks like he is sitting on your lap. PF: And you wonder why I don’t look amused?